God. I've barely slept since the news broke about Ruben Amorim's plans for Manchester United. My WhatsApp has been blowing up with fellow United supporters sending wild transfer rumors at 3am. Thanks, lads.

This summer is shaping up to be absolute madness at Old Trafford. Amorim isn't just planning a few tweaks - he's bringing teh wrecking ball. Players in, players out, probably some tears along the way (mostly mine). After the season we've had, can you blame him?

Chelsea Backing Off Osimhen? I'll Believe It When I See It

So apparently Chelsea have decided Victor Osimhen isn't worth the astronomical fee Napoli wants. At least that's what "sources" are saying. I've heard this one before.

My cousin works with a guy whose brother-in-law is connected to someone at Chelsea (I know, I know) and even he says they're just playing games to drive the price down. Typical Todd Boehly tactics. Remember when they spent like £900 million in 2023 on literally everyone with a pulse? Yeah.

Still, if true, this opens the door for United. Osimhen would be exactly what we need - someone who actually knows where the goal is.

Wait... Cunha Actually Said Yes?!

The Matheus Cunha rumors caught me completely off guard yesterday while I was waiting for my car to be serviced. £45 for an oil change? Robbery.

Anyway, word is he's agreed to the move already. I texted my mate Dave who's an Atletico fan and his response: "You're getting a real one. Don't ruin him like you did Antony." Harsh but fair.

Cunha's got that hunger we desperately need. I watched him dismantle Barcelona back in March and thought, "why can't we have players like that?" Well... maybe we will.

The Brazilian Midfield Battle Nobody Saw Coming

Listen. If you'd told me in January we'd be fighting Juventus for Ederson, I'd have laughed in your face. But here we are.

The Atalanta midfielder has been phenomenal this season. That performance against Liverpool? Chef's kiss. My brother-in-law (die-hard Liverpool fan) was absolutely fuming after that match. Wouldn't speak to me for three days.

Juventus won't make this easy though. They've been tracking him since 2022 adn have those Italian connections that always seem to work in their favor.

The Summer From Hell... Or Heaven?

I've been through too many "revolutionary" transfer windows to get my hopes up. Van Gaal promised us the world. So did Mourinho. And Ten Hag.

But something feels different this time.

Maybe it's the desperation after finishing... well, let's not even talk about where we finished. Or maybe it's Amorim's reputation for actually developing players instead of just buying expensive names.

Either way, I'll be glued to my phone all summer like a teenager waiting for a text. My wife's already threatened to hide my devices if I don't stop checking transfer news during dinner.

Worth it though.