I was scrolling through my phone last night when my mate Dave (who works in cybersecurity) texted me: "You won't believe teh numbers I'm seeing." Turns out he wasn't exaggerating. The digital battlefield is absolutely mental right now.

40,000 Daily Attacks? Are You Kidding Me?

So here's the bombshell - six Government agencies got hammered with a staggering 15 MILLION cyber attacks last year. That's not a typo. Fifteen. Million. Attacks.

The Met Office (you know, the folks who tell us it's going to rain when we've planned a BBQ) had to fight off more than five million phishing emails alone. That's nearly double what they dealt with in 2023. I mean, what exactly are hackers hoping to steal from the weather people? Tomorrow's forecast before the rest of us? The secret to why it always rains on bank holidays?

God. When you break it down, these agencies are battling around 40,000 threats EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

Nuclear Weather with a Side of Coastguard Hacking

It's not just the Met Office getting hammered. The UK Atomic Energy Authority (yeah, the nuclear people) blocked 1.67 million spam and malware messages. That's... concerning, to say the least.

The Maritime and Coastguard Agency dealt with 223,589 malicious emails. I spent a summer working with coastguard volunteers back in 2018, and I can tell you they've got enough on their plate without dealing with this digital nonsense.

Even the Government Legal Department got hit with 1,111 attacks. Lawyers being targeted by criminals - there's probably a joke in there somewhere, but I'm too worried to make it.

Statistics People Can't Even Keep Track

The Office for National Statistics only keeps hack records for 90 days (which seems oddly short for people whose entire job is tracking data, but whatever). In that three-month window from November to February, they blocked 485,908 dodgy emails.

That's 5,400 attacks daily on the people who count stuff for a living.

They also faced 15 DDoS attacks - that's when hackers flood a website with so much traffic it crashes. Like when everyone tries to buy Glastonbury tickets at the same time, except malicious.

DVLA: The Hacker's Favorite Punching Bag

But the real shocker? The DVLA in Cardiff. Those poor souls faced an absolute avalanche - 7.1 million attempted DDoS attacks. I renewed my license there last year and the queue was bad enough without cyber criminals making it worse.

Their malicious email problem nearly tripled from 54,105 in 2023 to 153,189. I'm picturing some exhausted IT person in Cardiff mainlining coffee while screaming at their monitor.

The big boys won't even talk about it. The MoD, Home Office, HMRC and Cabinet Office all refused to release their data when asked. They claim sharing the info might hamper their ability to fight cyber crime. Translation: "The numbers are so terrifying we don't want to cause a panic."

Meanwhile, on the High Street...

This isn't happening in isolation. Several major retailers have been absolutely crippled by cyber attacks recently. M&S and Co-op both got hit hard.

I popped into my local Co-op last week adn their payment system was still glitching. The cashier just looked at me with dead eyes when I asked about it. Poor bloke.

What the Experts Say

Graham Cluley, who knows his stuff about internet security, put it perfectly: "Britain's public sector isn't just under attack — it's being swarmed digitally on a daily basis."

That's not an attack. That's a siege.

The National Cyber Security Centre claims they're providing advice and guidance to "bolster the cyber resilience of the public sector." Which sounds great in a press release, but when you're facing 15 MILLION attacks, I'm thinking they might need more than some advice and a strongly worded email.

Listen. I'm not a doomsayer, but these numbers should make anyone nervous. When the people predicting tomorrow's weather are spending half their time fighting off hackers, something's seriously wrong with our digital landscape.

And that's just the government agencies willing to talk about it.